Posts Tagged ‘millcreek open’

New ratings after the Millcreek Open have been processed

Our club members new ratings are as follows:

Chris Bailey – down 3 points to 1657
Dan Barnes – down 30 points to 1173
Chris Malis – down 13 points to 1529

Receiving his first USATT rating is:
Evan Gould – initial ratings of 999

Welcome to the real world of pong, Evan.

Reaching new highs in their rating history are:

John Scarnato – up 116 points to 1275 after being rerated upwards
Kyle Barnes – up 45 points to 426

Congrats to John and Kyle on soaring to new heights.

Quick recap of the 2009 Millcreek Open

While we wait for tournament director Sam Steiner’s official tournament summary, I thought I would post a quick recap of the results of our Butler Table Tennis Club members at the 2009 Millcreek Open played on October 24-25.

Newcomer Evan Gould gained his first tournament experience and realized that the weekly beatings he receives at the Butler club are actually an integral part of improving his game.

Dan Barnes attended.

John Scarnato mercilessly pummeled opponents in the U-1300 Division enroute to winning the top prize.

As a myriad of kills shots caromed off the table and crashed into his victims welt-ridden bodies, the vanquished could only wonder why each painful body blow was followed by screams of “That’s for stealing my stuff, mother#@%$!$#%!”

When the carnage was over, Mr. Scarnato cheerfully accepted this:

John Scarnato's U-1300 Trophy

Congratulations John.

I believe Kyle Barnes won the U-700 event but need to verify that. Good job Kyle.

Chris Bailey did not lose to anybody rated below him and did not beat anybody rated above him.

Emulating the worlds largest yo-yo, he burned off 3 boxes of Ho Hos while being jerked from side to side in suffering two separate agonizing 5 game losses to a couple of friendly Chinese Canadian players with a combined 145 years of life experience.  Chris still loves Ho Hos.

Ho Hos

Several times during each match, Chris swore he heard his opponents chuckling the phrase “run fat boy, run”.

In a more pleasant turn of events, Chris’s maniacal rantings and threats of horrific violence if he didn’t win a damn door prize at this years Millcreek Open were snuffed out when he won this lovely gift:

HP J4580

This made Chris very happy.

And finally we come to El Presidente, Chris “Gandhi” Malis.

Mr. Malis has apparently switched to a brand of table tennis we will henceforth refer to as “pacifist pong”.

When questioned by his exasperated 3400 doubles partner as to why he refused to put away high balls, Chris would only reply “I am prepared to die, but there is no cause for which I am prepared to kill.”

When questioned about several losses to obviously inferior opponents, he muttered “It has always been a mystery to me how men can feel themselves honoured by the humiliation of their fellow beings.”

We wish Chris the best of luck in his quest to be at peace with the universe.